Joan Vandervliet 1944-2009

As many of you know, my mother has been fighting pancreatic cancer for the past year.

This weekend, she finally earned her rest.

If you ever had met my mother, you know there was nothing more important to her than her family, which was extended to more than just my siblings and myself through her involvement in community, both in Midland Park, through her activities with the school organizations we participated in our youth, and then her 15+ years as a member of the Midland Park Board of Education.

She was “Aunt Joanie” to so many, a surrogate mother to others, friends of ours who lost the mother.

None was more important to her than her grandchildren, Sarah and Matthew, for whom she fought so fiercely for every day she had for the past year.

My brother, and sisters have lost our biggest supporter, our staunchest advocate, and our greatest ally in our pursuit of dreams and future.

Sometimes she was also our greatest infuriation, but in that way that someone who sees what is  best for us, when we ourselves can’t.

At this time I want to thank my friends who have helped me through this past year, with all the support you have given. You helped make it possible for me to make it through this past year, and to face the future ahead.

with great love

David

Below find my mother’s obituary.

VANDERVLIET, Joan, nee Traino, age 64, died at her home on Saturday, March 14, 2009.

Born in Paterson, she lived in Midland Park since 1979. Joan served on the Midland Park Board of Education from 1993 to 2008, serving as both President and Vice-President during her tenure. She was also an active member of Grace Church in Ridgewood, serving in many ministries, most dear to her was the Missions Committee.

Joan is survived by her loving children; Terri Morse of Midland Park, Susan Vandervliet of Gulfport, FL, Robert Vandervliet of Houston, TX, and David Vandervliet of the Bronx, NY; and her grandchildren Sarah and Matthew Morse. She is also survived by her brother John Traino of Hawthorne, NJ.

Visiting hours will be Tuesday 7 to 9 pm, and Wednesday 2 to 4 pm at Grace Church, 340 Meadowbrook Ave, Ridgewood, NJ 07450. There will be a funeral service on Wednesday at 7:00 pm at Grace Church. There will be a prayer service at Grace Church on Thursday at 10:00 am, followed by the interment at the George Washington Memorial Park, Paramus. Arrangements by the Vander Plaat Funeral Home, 257 Godwin Ave., Wyckoff, NJ, www.vpfh.com.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the Grace Church Mission Fund, 340 Meadowbrook Ave, Ridgewood, NJ 07450, or the Darrah B. Swezey Scholarship Fund, 55 East Center St., Midland Park, NJ 07432.

Crawling from the Wreckage – or just moving forward.

I think i see the light at the end of the tunnel…

Did you hear a train whistle?

Now, I don’t want to seem overdramatic.

I know my life is not “bad” per se. I have had fortunate to have had so many opportunties given to me.

I know that the only person who is responsible for any anxiety I feel is me, and outside of those people who have known me through my various incarnations, and known the me beneath it all, what I do and say here will not affect you much.

There is something about tracking one’s progress like this, in open forum tho that motivates someone like me to get off my ass, get in the game. By putting it here, you can call me on it. I am making a commitment to the universe, but really with myself

OK – I have 4 days off in a row. (it has been since Sept 2007 since that happened)

The writer in me wants out, so I plan on spending from tonight til sunday working on a 1st draft of a pilot script. 4 acts, 45minutes in length Single camera family drama, which I am currently calling “My Generation”

By the end of 2008 I want to try character work, so I plan on trying to write 3 spec scripts, for current shows.

Thoughts?

Geeksville – Childhood for sale

Yes I am selling pieces of my childhood off a bit at time on ebay

I started by posting 9 vintage star wars action figures, amazingly 5 went very quickly with BUY IT NOW (they were a mix of foreign carded and minor scuffed RTOJ or POTF1 cards) but there are still 4 left! Including Yoda, on the first card he was ever issued and a Cool Han Solo – see links below.

The gentleman who bought up most of the figures already sold, made me an open offer on the lot of my remaining vintage Star Wars collection so next weekend I will begin unpacking boxes and taking photos to send him.

Never thought I would see this day come…

Han Solo in Trench Coat – 1984 ROTJ CARD

B-Wing Pilot – 1986 POTF Card w/ Coin

Death Squad Commander – 1977 12 Back Original!

YODA – 1980 ESB 40 Back Card

In a way its good.  Very good,  my love for these things, has kept me back, kept me from embracing my full adulthood – I have collected and compiled and hung on to so many things, that it is hard to make room in my heart for the new.

More things coming soon

Countdown to Midlife Crisis 12 – The Countdown resumes

hey there blog buddies -

Thank you thank you thank you for all your support again,  so many of you have given me so much in the ways that you all could, and I am eternally grateful.

But that doesn’t make up for the lack of COUNTDOWNS. So….

RETURNS!

So  lets quick catch up, I am temping and I hate it, but I knew I would when I started.  So I sally forth.

Things are slowly coming together for me on the homefront, as I catch up after 8 months of touring.   I am looknig into the possiblity of getting a roommate,  now since I have a 1 bedroom, that means I may need to move, unless I become very close to a single female anytime soon (no don’t have one in particular in mind). That being said, I have shared my place short term with friends before,  folks who needed a place to stay while they were in town for a week a month ever a couple of days, and I will continue that offer as long as folks need it.  (think of it as staying at Dave’s Bronx B&B)

I know many of you have expressed concern about my mother.  She is still in chemo, but responding as well as we could have hoped.  Her spirits are strong, and positive, and she is looking forward to the family vacation she had planned before she became ill, in August, when she will go with my sisters and their families to Myrtle Beach, SC for a week.

GEEKSVILLE -  its coming back don’t you worry, I have 2 reviews sitting on my desk that need proofing,  A comic and that second half of the Doctor Who finale.

LOST LOVE -  Well I said in the last one, I think I am done with that now,  I have been looking to my past to figure out what I had been doing wrong there, and It has served me well -  I do have a new series planned to follow up on it.  I think if you like to read the MISSED CONNECTIONS on craigslist.org  yo may like this. LOL

JOB HUNT -  That is the next project,  I am temping yes, I have no intentions of staying in the place forever tho, so expect to hear about what it takes to re-invent yourself in today’s job market.

Ok  much peace to you all -

The Countdown continues…..

I need your help

Hey Friends,

I am not sure how it has come to this…

As most of you know, I have been helping taking care of my mother, who has stage 4 pancreatic cancer.   This has not been easy on my mother, my family or myself.  I had been working on tour for the past 6 months, and between my tour expenses, travel to and from home to see/help and just my normal expenses (rent, phone, electric, student loans…etc)  I am starting to fall behind.

And now tour is over, I should be getting re-imbursed for my tour expenses soon, but without work income coming in (my tour contract ended 6/15)  and mom’s medical expenses keep coming in…

Well I am waiting on a temp job (I should be working next week) and I have put in for unemployment, so I should get some money for the time I am waiting for work to start up again… but the next two weeks are going to be rough..  so I thought, hey I can’t ask any one friend for a 4-500 bucks I would need to get through the rest of june, but maybe I can ask my 150-200 or so friends out there who read my blogs and are on my facebook and myspace  to each lend me 5-20 bucks.

Is there any one out there who feel they can help me out?

I have Paypal, and those of you who are members of the AFCU, you can even just transfer funds to me.

Thank you for your help

David

Countdown Week 20 – This Mortal Coil

Its mid May -  and I am still on the road, still away from my family, during a particularly trying time at home.

I have always lived my life with the idea that there was plenty of time to do everything I want.    But now I know that is not the case.

I never thought that my mother wouldn’t be there for my wedding, to be a grandmother to my kids…

But like so many other things in my life, I chose small.  I managed to stay safe and surround myself with things I think I want. So why do I still want those things?

I never really thought I would be 36 years old and still single. But if you know anything about me you know I have a history of avoiding taking the next step.  Personally, professionally,  i just want things to be easy, I don’t know where this work ethic developed.  But it has made me a concilliator and a diplomat.

I can handle hard! – I am smart- scary smart sometimes, and because of it certain things came easy to me early in life,  and because of that I did not have to try as hard as others.  I never was challanged early….

I am looking for that great challenge!

The Countdown is back – Countdown week 26 – Televison is the mirror of my reality

Ok -  I bet you read that and thought I was going to say something about reality TV -  well  you  would be wrong, since I don’t really watch too much reality TV.  Oh I may catch a bit of Extreme Makeover Home Addition, because I enjoy seeing how they make some of those things.  And some of the other renovation shows (going all the way back to “This Old House”)  cause even though I am not a home owner, I like to know how to do things around the house.  And sometimes sitting in a hotel room you have nothing to watch but some of the trainwreck celebreality shows on VH-1, but that is not reality…  my reality is on CBS and its called “The Big Bang Theory“

This week’s episode, entitled “The Nerdvana Annihilation” once again made me laugh at myself and at times scared me a little too much of what I am. This week’s episode brought up the issue of choosing to put away nerdyish things, to become a more mainstream member of society.

It is a delimna I find myself in – There are things going on in my life right now, important things, that I need to face, and I have to put aside some of the things truely make me happy for a time.

Where have I been

Some of you have begun to ask me -  what happened?  Where have you been David, I have missed my weekly Geek love and midlife crisis updates

Well the last few weeks have been quite a handful for me.  My tour life was taking a bit of a toll on my body, as I fought off a cold, so late feb and early march I began to slack off a bit

Then I was hit with a bit of a personal bomb,  My mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer, a non operable 3cm tumor had developd at the tip of her pancreas and had begun to matasize into her liver.

If you happen to see the recent news about Patrick Swayze, then you may know how serious this cancer is.

My attention of late has been, understandbly on my mother, and my family.

I will return to this blog – I want to -  I need to have something regular to focus back on.

Thanks to my friends who have offered their emotional support

Countdown Week 36 – I was Lost in Time and Space

This blog was written  on 2/16  it was the last blog I had written for a while.  I have had a lot going on, and you will be able to read about a lot of it soon

but here it -

OK so I missed last week’s blog - I know.

The truth is just I had not a lot to say – which is funny since so much was going on - Super Bowl – Super Tuesday – my Tour – Roger Clemens’ Steroids scandal – my pitiful excuse for a personal life.

Where do I begin?

I heard a story about a man who ran over a child, and is not suing the parents of the kid, for the damage to his car – Can you believe people?

I had an idea I began to outline to start a video blog project with my brother. (I haven’t begun to approach him about it, to discuss politics. I don’t seem to discuss politics with many of my friends or family. I mean I know where they stand on most issues, with my father and brother on the far right end of the political stick and my mother is more right than center, my sister, who now owns property and has kids is probably just right of center, but socially she still leans left (I think of her as Eisenhower style republican) My other sister is more liberal, but to be honest I am not sure just how liberal. You figure a lesbian living in Florida is probably pretty leftist – but I think she may be more Liberatarian.

Then there is me, way out on the far left end of thought. Sometimes I forget how alien I am to the enviroment that spawned me.

I heard it said once, If your a Republican under 30 you don’t have a heart, but if your a Democrat over 30 you don’t have a brain.

Counting down to my Midlife Crisis – Week 42 -Holiday Blues

So I have had trouble writing this blog -

I was set to write it on Christmas day (yes its late) but I was in such a bad mood that I decided it would be better to just wait it out

So yeah Christmas was a bit of a bust this year for me – the second year in a row.

I don’t mean gifts. At 36 I don’t really expect the excitment of gifts on Christmas Morning. Its just been emotionally empty.