I have been thinking about dating a lot lately.
I do date, believe it or not. But I will be honest, my track record when it comes to dating is not stellar. I get good first dates, and then second dates go well - then I get busy with rehearsals, or even worse, leave town for a show and before you know it, its been 6 weeks since I seen her, and she goes and gets married or something. You may have read some of my earlier blogs about some of the women in my (distant) past. And yes, I do intend to write the next letter soon (its coming stop nagging). I just wanted to take this moment to address my dating future
I live in New York City and according someone’s research, there are 81 single men for every 100 women in Manhattan. Women live longer than men so that should explain a part of that gap. There are also more gay men than gay women (about 4 gay men to 1 lesbian) in NYC so the numbers are in flux and hard to quantify.
So by all means I should be able to find someone I would want to date. In fact I would say that I have found lots of women I would like to date, and that is part of the problem, I would like to date a lot of them. I don’t mean jut sex either. I have had sex (really I have) I have had sex with some very attractive, funny, sweet, sexy women (I have to! Stop laughing) I have actually found it easier to find someone to have sex with than it is to find someone who just wants to go out and be goofy with.
But I have all these amazing women in my life, some of them are close friends and some of them are single (and I can’t for the life of me figure out why), And while I enjoy having some of these people in my life casually, I will admit I have thought about asking them out. And while fear of rejection and ruining a good friendship is a factor, it is not the main reason I don’t ask these women out.
Its sad, but the reason I don’t ask many of these women out it socio-economic. A friend told me once, “Women date up, Men date down” Women date men who are more likely to match their lifestyle, while men date women who don’t threaten their masculinity by making more money then they do.
And while I am not threatened by a woman who makes more money than I do, I want to be able to at least go outwith a girl for lunch or drinks and not have to do the math to figure out if I can have the potato skins and another Guiness without making my rent check bounce.
So as with all things, its my inabilty to crack into more lucrative work in theatre or writing that is keeping me from what I want. Yet I keep doing the same thing.
Wow that whole blog to just say - being poor sucks!
(this blog is also on Myspace)